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How To Talk Dirty Guide: What To Do & Examples Of What To Say

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… You like eatin’ that hole out for me, don’t you? You like to feel a real big cock up that fuckin’ hole, don’t you? In the baroque flights of fancy of the most extravagant wordsmiths, dirty talk becomes a kind of found poetry. Again, how naughty or how vanilla should it be—that depends on you and only you. Of course, you can begin light and safe and, over time, find the right sexy words and use them more. So if the thought of it makes you cringe but you’d still like to give it a try, we’ve got you—here’s a beginner’s guide to dirty talk.

Tips For Making Your Dirty Talk Even More Powerful

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Dr. Tara says one accessible way to talk dirty is to simply describe (exactly) what’s happening as you’re having sex. This can be really erotic and doesn’t require you to quickly recall phrases or scenarios. Talking dirty introduces an additional sense (hearing) to any sexcapade, which stimulates the brain in a way that goes beyond just touch. “Dirty talk makes the sexual interaction a mind and body experience,” says sexologist Megan Stubbs, EdD. Start small, ramp up over time, and ask your partner (outside of your sexual play) if they have any preferences as to the words that you do or don’t use in your dirty talk repertoire.

  • If you practice alone what you want to do with a partner (even if in your head), you’ll eventually gain the confidence to share those thoughts during the heat of the moment.
  • It’s important to remember that everyone is different and has their own unique preferences when it comes to sexual communication, and it’s important to always communicate with your partner and respect their boundaries and desires.
  • I’m ecstatic just thinking about your cock every day.
  • “Dirty talk doesn’t have to be raunchy, but it can if you want it to be!
  • A good rule of thumb with dirty talk is to tell your partner what you want to do to them/with them before you’re actually doing it, and then, while you’re doing it, specifically describe what it is you like about it.

What Is Whisper Porn?

“One possibility is maybe she has a dependent personality and maybe she likes the idea of submitting to a dominant, powerful force,” she said. “Or maybe she fantasizes about being the dominant one and is afraid to put that on to her guy to do it first, so she tests the waters.” Doesn’t it feel good to turn to your man after a hot session, still floating in your sex haze, and say, “Baby, that was the best I’ve ever had,” and mean it.

You Might Also Enjoy

Guys are more singular in their focus, whereas women can hold many things in their mind at once when it comes to sexual arousal. This is especially crucial if your partner is a woman. Women, in particular, are often aroused through the imagination. This is why erotic books like 50 Shades of Gray are infamous smash hits among female readers.

“You don’t have to put so much pressure on yourself to just be one thing,” Manta says. Especially for those that enjoy consensually degrading verbal play, aftercare is an essential piece of sex to keep the consent, communication, and boundaries in line for all. Rachel Wright, MA, LMFT, recommends using your senses to describe what you’re feeling, seeing, smelling, tasting, and hearing. Here are some of Wright’s suggestions for what to say. Cordingley suggests just practicing some racy words or phrases out loud when you’re alone so you can get more comfortable hearing yourself say them.

Remember to stay in tune with what your spouse likes and is comfortable with. Sometimes, a spicy photo with no context can be a delightful surprise, but sometimes it can be jarring if the receiver is not in the mood yet. Make a concentrated effort to flirt with your spouse, even when you aren’t physically together. Don’t underestimate how powerful it is to know your spouse is thinking about you (and thinking how sexy you are) even when you aren’t around.

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